Hospital Psychotics 1

So we put all these old people in a room.
We told each of them a different thing..
And now they’re all going crazy,
Expecting something that’s not real.
We’ve got cameras everywhere, watching them.

Look, here’s Johnson. He thinks if he stays awake longer than anyone else, he’ll get a million dollars.

This is Mary. She thinks this is the waiting room for an Elderly Dating
Soap Opera. She’s going to die from a terminal disease in two days.

Over here is Jeffrey. We took him from another nursing home where he’s
been pumped on anti-psychotics and replaced one of his pills with an
amphetamine. He’s ten seconds away from turning the mess hall into a
bloody mess.

Each of our staff has cameras attached to their lapels.
They walk around and conduct interviews.
Each old person has a different view on what’s going on – and they’ve all been instructed to keep quiet about what they know.
As a result, they think everyone else is crazy.
What’s ironic is that they are all correct.
They’re all crazy.
But not as Crazy as me, the
Show’s Producer.

My name is Michael Brodberry. I grew up in the northern part of
Illinois. I spent my youth scamming my elderly neighborhood of their
fortunes under the guise of raising funds for my school, my cancer
treatment, my grandmother’s funeral, my cat’s funeral, my replacement
cat, my girlfriend’s step-mom’s plane ticket, my first company, my
second company..

They grew old,

And funnier.